Black Belt

It's official. I can beat you up. All of you. I won't though. That wouldn't be nice. I wouldn't want to hurt you. I found out last week that I passed the test. I actually got the belt the week before, but found out the results of the test after that. Isn't that weird? Korea doesn't always make sense. Anyway, after we got our belts, but before the official results, we had a photo shoot in our uniforms. The Korean guy is our master. He was very nervous before our test, but we did him proud, and he wasn't so nervous after. We all did really well.

This is my name on my black belt. We wanted them to write our names in Korean. They put Craig's in English and spelled it wrong. We figured they couldn't get it wrong in Korean, and it's cooler that way.

Think happy thoughts

Okay, I had my moment. Now I will think happy thoughts. I want to go home. I'm tired of Korea. On Saturday I yelled at a little girl for staring at me. I think it's time to leave now.

So, happy thoughts. I will get to see all you guys soon. 21 days. I will get to go shopping and find clothes that actually fit. I will get to play with those kids that are doing all of their growing up without me. I suppose I could even babysit Xavier and Niles just for old times' sake. I'm sure they would appreciate it. I can go to a Rider game. Play my trumpet. At the same time even. I can go to a restaurant and not have to sit on the floor, and not have the wait staff be afraid to speak to me. They might have to speak English you know. I still want a good hamburger. I can have one in three weeks.

I am excited to go home. I really am. I just don't want to leave. Oh well. I can always come back.

Mixed feelings

I have four weeks left in Korea. That's 28 days. That's not very many. It's scary. I want to leave. I'm tired of living here right now. I'm tired of people looking at me, I'm tired of being a freak. I can't go anywhere without people staring at me, or trying to practice their English. I want to go home and see everyone. I want to go to church and have a church family again. I want to know what is going on. I want to drive. I want a hamburger. (Diane, I expect to have those yummy hamburgers. You know, the ones that have all that cheese on the inside so when you take a bite you get a mouthfull of cheese. Ya, those ones.) Yes, I am looking forward to going home. I do want to be there, but at the same time, I don't want to leave. I have changed since I came to Korea, and I like who I am. I'm scared that I will change back. I'm scared that I won't let myself be who I am. I'm scared about my internship. We all know how well it worked last time, and I'm scared that it will be the same this time. I want to go home. I really do. I don't want to leave. I don't want to go months without seeing Samuel. I know lots of people did the whole long distance relationship thing, but I don't want to. I like seeing him. I don't want to leave. I want to go home. I can't have both.