Thursday, March 5

episode 1

When I had been in Korea for about six months one of the Korean teachers asked me if I had a boyfriend. I didn't, so I said no. She said, oh, you must be lonely. I thought about that for a bit. I didn't realize that I needed a boyfriend to be happy. I thought I was happy. I didn't have a boyfriend, and I wasn't lonely. Is that weird? It was to her. I didn't think it was weird. I had never had a boyfriend, and I had managed. I didn't need a boyfriend to complete my life. Then I met Samuel. Now I understand what Sook-Jin meant. Now I would say that I am lonely. I can't go visit my boyfriend after work. I don't get to see him this weekend, or next week or even next month. I'll talk to him, but it's not the same. Before I met Samuel I didn't know what it was that I was missing out on. I had never experienced it so I didn't miss it. Now that I have experienced love I don't want to live without it. So now I'm lonely. You all are great, but you aren't Samuel. I'm lonely for him. I never want to have a long distance relationship ever again. I suppose I haven't not been in a long distance relationship. Samuel and I lived in different cities so I only saw him on weekends and we talked during the week. At least we got to see each other sometimes. It has now been seven months since I last saw him. Now we talk on weekends and email during the week. I love talking to him, I love reading his emails, but it just isn't the same as actually talking to him, when I can see him. I would really like to have a not long distance relationship. I could try that. See if I like it.

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